Off late I have been feeling quite suffocated at home. Surprising, right? A family of four is living with household items for may be, 20 such families!
Now, I am going to keep it short and make it more of a journal in actual form. It has been a real struggle and my family has finally come to terms (including me) to declutter the house and make it look more purposeful. It is a tricky dive and we have already anticipated a lot of arguments in the days to come. But the more I go back home from work at night, the more I get frightened of getting trapped in overwhelming amount of items around the house. We need that cleanse.
I will not really name this process a minimalism cleanse but more of becoming conscious and rational about how I manage personal finances. It might include a bit of sorting and giveaways. I am going to share details of my achievements time to time. May be my achievements could serve as suggestions to one of the many digitally manipulated minds like mine!
It had been a long and short year, isn’t it? It is already 2021!! Mentally I am still trying to process as to how 2020 flew right after the lock down happened. Started with a World War III rumor, moved on to the virus followed by a pool of thoughts overwhelming us while we were under lock down. Some people took up baking, while some learnt to give time to family. Massive lay offs, a sudden work from home routine for the rest while the stay home population took the test of time dealing with the earners 24×7. People got bored and they gave major sales to the markets while the suicide rates went up along with corona death rates. People lost their jobs in all working sectors while some businessmen made money by selling certificates over zoom calls. Much to the surprise, people kept their spirits high and welcomed the festivities with much enthusiasm. I am talking about the U. S. Presidential Election. That was a major!
Oh well, just when the time arrived for us to make new promises to break, eventually, this year made it quite an unusual happening; more of “what we learnt” and few “this year I would like to.” Looks like 2020-won; or should I say 2021!
Hoping that we heal from the grudges we are holding back, the safe plays that lead us to nowhere, the petty choices that make us toxic lovers/coworkers and hoping that the world has learnt the virtue of gratitude. As I write my first blog of 2021, I also realized a thing: isn’t it the 21st year of the 21st century? A double yet again……fingers crossed with a lot of sinking feeling in my stomach.
But none the less; a very Happy New Year, Earthlings!
I hope we all are keeping super safe and being responsible. September was crazy busy- teacher training is not a cakewalk, y’all! So yeah, when finally I have one evening to myself after so long, I had to share this awesome thought or rather a fresh perspective that I came across a few days ago. You see humans are so exciting to understand. More than that, the human minds. We make logic and beliefs out of our convenience. And we seek validation for that perspective. Once that’s done we literally push people into following rules. What an illusion! Or delusion?
If we all are familiar with the term propaganda we all know how widely its practicality gets miused or misinterpreted. Somewhere it becomes a matter of life and death. Among all the –ists following all sorts of –isms there is always one wise source who knows how to alter education and awareness into dogmas and traditions. Again, this is my perspective!
In one such conversation with my friend, Bindita she gave me an interesting reply to a question that I asked that has strong “developing country” connect!
The question was:
Why do you think women in India still leave or quit their financial independence after marriage…even in this 21st century?
Personally I felt Bindita’s answer was quite an eye opener.
“Well, I think there is not a specific collective reason why women quit their jobs after marriage. Rather, I can say that there are some very common reasons like toxic offices, poor career development, lack of solid leadership, pressures from the families,etc.Nevertheless…I have seen most of the women couldn’t follow their career because of the fragile ego of men. Let me tell you, India has the largest number of single women at present!Ancient social customs as well as a patriarchal society force the maximum number of women to quit their jobs after marriage and motherhood. See the problem is at every stage, even in this 21st century, women are made to consider that certain things are only meant for men, however, today’s urban woman is far more self-confident, ambitious, and positive. I would say that the checklist for women’s responsibilities has only increased with time!
However, there are some unique cases which were quite awful to me, I have seen some women in my life, who were set to quit their jobs after marriage in a happy state of mind, they said they won’t work as their husbands make quite a handsome amount…I am sure you have also come across such females. The catch here is the big delusion – women do jobs for money! Of course, it’s a purpose but it’s not a whole thing you see…we want our individuality, we wish to create our self-dependent mode rather than just depending completely on others, and here the actual empowerment comes. At least I believe in this concept, I don’t know about others though. Also, I believe the public policy in India especially, has nose-dived women as well as young girls in general, who have gone through marital dissolution. You may think how? Well, by not providing them with their simple basic rights and not safeguarding their economic safety. I think economic empowerment is the significantthing to survive for any women.
I think the whole attitude needs to change, starting with the girl child’s upbringing at home. I have seen that even after completing their higher education, women are not precisely encouraged to work outside their houses. Parents (not everyone) feel they have done their liability by educating their daughters and what is left is marrying them off. Even in broad-minded societies, there is very little family support and if a woman becomes a mother, that intrinsic emotional culpability of not being a good enough mother, will certainly make you to give up your career for your child’s nourishment.On the other hand, bigger accountabilities at the workplace come with less time with the family.
So you can see that with the additional burden of being a superwoman, we are still struggling with basic human rights even in this 21st century. The problem here is more deep-rooted than it seems.”
That I come to a realization point as to where do I stand in life right now? I have my necessities and luxuries all covered. I am forever grateful. What’s next? Is there something that I should be doing extra? Is there something that I should avoid? Is this how life is going to be for the rest of my life?
It is always on a Sunday…….
That I realize how much I love my company. I mean I still wonder when did I exactly become so self sufficient. I look back only a couple of years and the scene is absolutely different. I had no time to be lonely. I was never alone. I had so many friends to get loud with. May be it was time for me to wake my senses to understand the reality that few of them would stay though whatever. And it was not a sad feeling at all.
It is always on a Sunday……
My memories take me back to the times I fell in love. I would say they were wrong. Those times I really believed in those words and nights. The passion and fights. It was only when I met the final one. The only one. That made me rethink about the things that lacked in the past. It was not communication. It was comprehension. I sure as hell had transparent communication with all my exes. It only lacked the understanding of the fact that were we on same page on everything or not.
It is always on a Sunday…….
That I feel grateful of my unsettled life. I do have every happiness at hand but it has only made me try out new things in life. Get new perspectives on life out of fear of getting bored. It is always on a Sunday when its meant to rest up. I feel thankful to have a chaotic mind to keep myself fueled with directions to look forward to……
This page looks like a day in any millennial’s life trying to figure out her or his life. Simultaneously trying to get accepted by everyone around while accepting herself or himself. The exact reason why I fell in love with the author’s way of portraying the struggle.
Adulting by Neharika Gupta.
it is safe to say that the book is named quite aptly. Given our parents’ generation they were married and already planning a second child when they were may be, 28?
We are here 30 and still cannot iron our clothes!
Responsibilities and duties seem like irrelevant words thrown at us. We dread them like those imaginary demons under the beds when we were 3. Neharika Gupta introduces her readers to Ruhi, a young editor, Aisha, a social media influencer and manager and Tejas, an author. The author kept it simple with the plot while giving us a very real picture of all the dilemma that one goes through as a millennial. Few thoughts of the characters are worth giving multiple reads to sink into the honesty of the facts. There are no major twists and turns as the author tried to keep the book more driven by the characters and not the plot.
What surprised me is that Ruhi, Aisha and Tejas are definitely one of us. From a female’s perspective, we all have met at least one Tejas in our lives who could never make up his mind. Or rather own up to his thoughts. Similarly, Ruhi and Aisha are struggling to prove their existence and worth by either contradicting in their thoughts and actions or trying to please the world around them. Some might say that the characters were spineless and the author could not set the right goal for the book. Parts of it would make you think like that also because of the high relevance to the reality. So in that way the book is less unpredictable and there is a lack of a surprise element that would awe the readers.
However, with rational use of the social media lingo and LIT lives of these Instagram friendly characters, Neharika Gupta did the good job with the ending. I would say it was pretty much a smart end to the book by bringing the characters together for the last chapter.
It is a good book if you overlook the critical factors and enjoy it as a light read. Few parts are worth to get hooked on to like the chapters where Ruhi, Aisha and Tejas each one of them go through self realizations. Those are definitely my favorites!
Other than that it is a book that can be only enjoyed by the readers of the targeted generation here. Although I would say there’s nothing wrong with it!